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Hiya, I know how much you enjoy taking quizzes and you all know how much I enjoy writing quizzes, so here are two really quick quizzes I made over at www.buzzdash.com. Take them! Which is the best super hero movie series? Which is the best science fiction series of all time?

Hey, remember Mike Judge? He's that guy who did that little show called Beavis & Butthead and this movie you like called Office Space. You might also recognize his name as being the creator of King of the Hill. Did you know he had a new movie out? Well, probably not because Fox did a hell of a job keeping it out of theaters and unless you live in Austin you probably didn't even know it was in a theater near you (that is, only if you live in L.A., Atlanta, Chicago, Dallas, Houston or Toronto). What, exactly, was Fox's beef? It's really not clear. Judge was doing what he is best at - commenting the stupidity/ignorance that exists in America and imagining a world where "teh sm4rts" are wiped out and the only people left are the ones who eat stupid food for breakfast. While the movie is a bit odd and certainly doesn't have a blockbuster plot or cast, the premise leaves us much to think about and is a truly genius idea that doesn't get touched on often (although Futurama manages to sneak some "future stupidity" in at times). The main premise is explained brilliantly in the beginning of the film - an interview with a young, educated couple explaining that they are not ready to have kids, they feel it's "too early," and a cutaway to a "white trash" family (fathered by "Clevon") surprised by another pregnancy. Five years later, the "educated" couple states they're not ready - "not in this market" - and the "white trash" family has spawned more children thanks to the help of the neighbor woman. The educated couple ends up learning that the man has a low sperm count and one of Clevon's sons is shown as a football hero promising the cheerleaders he will "fuck all y'all" to Clevon's prideful cheers. So begins the "de-evolution" of humans where the more intelligent fail to breed while the less intelligent breed at a high rate, thus lowering the human IQ substantially. Meanwhile, back at The Military, a soldier named Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) who fits the description of "the most average man available" is picked to participate in a top-secret human hibernation project in which he is to be frozen and woken up at a later date. His female counterpart, Rita (Maya Rudolph), is a prostitute who was chosen for the job because she was the only woman they could find who was willing to go along with it. In the midst of the experiment, the Army base where Joe and Rita were being "stored" is destroyed (due to the top man in the Top Secret chain being booted out of the Army on various sex charges) and thus the two chambers are forgotten. Five hundred years later in the year 2505, since people have become quite lazy, trash is no longer buried or recycled - it's just piled up into huge mountains. This results in the "Great Trash Avalanche of 2505" and results in the uncovering of Joe and Rita's hibernation chamber. The avalanche pushes Joe's chamber through the apartment window of one "typical American" guy named Frito - who is too enthralled with the show Ow! My Balls (an obvious reference to Jackass) on his gigantic TV and eating "people chow" from a bucket whilst sitting on his sofa/toilet to care that a man from the past has just crashed into his apartment. So begins Joe's (and then also Rita's) quest to return to the past. Since all humans in the future are tattooed with a bar code on their wrist, and Joe lacks said bar code, he quickly lands in jail. But since he is smarter than everyone else in the future (even though in the present he is squarely average), he's able to quickly escape, thus becoming a fugitive. The rest of the movie is filled with clever sight gags and social commentary. The town's clock tower blinks "12:00" because no one is smart enough to set the time. Everyone speaks a "mixture of valley speak and ghetto talk" which is hard for Joe to understand (and vice-versa - they accuse Joe of being "gay" because he speaks so...awkwardly). The lowest form of humor - fart and sex jokes - have become the norm (for example, the restaurant Fuddruckers is now named Buttfuckers, and Ow! My Balls! is the most popular show on TV). What is considered cursing in today's language is considered the norm in the future language. As expected, capitalism plays a huge part in the future world. People have names like "Frito," "Tylenol" and "Mountain Dew." Starbucks is just as ubiquitous but it has become a "gentleman's massage parlor" (as have many other establishments such as H&R Block). Costco is where you can go to buy furniture, catch a train or get a law degree. Prison inmates wear name-brand track suits. Water fountains no longer serve water - they spout a Gatorade-like drink called Brawndo which contains "electrolytes." In fact, water is only known as "the stuff in the toilet" in the future, as Brawndo takes over as the liquid of choice. Joe ends up getting caught - but not sent back to jail. Instead, he is delivered to the White House to meet with President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho (played by Terry Crews of Everybody Hates Chris), a former "pro" wrestler who was obviously voted in on his crowd appeal. The President has called for Joe because his prison IQ test (required so they can place him in a suitable prison job) showed that he was far and beyond the most intelligent man alive. Camacho appoints Joe as the new Secretary of State and promises to the people that he will fix all of the nation's problems because he is a genius. Of course, Joe doesn't actually know how to run a country and the people quickly turn on him, forcing him and Rita to go back on the run in search of a "time machine" promised by Frito. More downright stupidity ensues. I have a feeling that this movie will become another "cult hit" for Judge as Office Space did. Perusing the IMDB pages for the movie, I'm reminded of how much visual comedy is going on in the background and I am already itching to see it again and share it with friends. There is definitely a lot going on that requires multiple viewings. Idiocracy is definitely a gem to add to your collection and one you will enjoy talking about with friends - maybe even finding a special catch phrase or two. If nothing else, check it out so you can see just what the hell Fox was so scared of. Because if Fox doesn't like it, it's pretty sure that you will. Oh, by the way - don't get this movie from Netflix. The copy I got was totally scratched and skippy. The Stupids must have gotten to it first.

We can agree to disagree about the political messages in the movie 300, whether it was propaganda or gay-bashing.  But I think everyone who saw the movie will agree it was quite violent. But was the violence excessive or gratuitous?  The only empirical way I can think of to find out is to remove the violence from the epic: [youtube]gNqiSkd1M6k[/youtube]

The movie 300, based on the Frank Miller graphic novel, has earned $70 million at the box office, breaking some records. But if you read some of the commentary out there you might not be too interested in seeing it. All the villains are gay. All the good guys are white and the bad guys are black. The whole thing is just Frank Miller's thinly-veiled cheering for Bush to invade Iran. Etc. Now, 300 is definitely not a historical documentary. But I don't think the criticisms mentioned above are completely true-although I can certainly see why many people may have jumped to them. First off, any movie about war coming out in the year 2007 will inevitably be seen as a commentary or allegory for the current War in Iraq. That's understandable, but probably not reflective of the intent behind this particular movie. In fact, 300 (the novel) came out in 1999, well before the current Bush presidency. Ah, but isn't Frank Miller known to be somewhat right-wing, and couldn't he have updated the movie to better reflect his clash-of-civilizations views today? Miller has said that 300 is largely director Zack Snyder's film. Although he seems more-or-less pleased with the result, he plans on directing any movies based on his books himself from now on. Second, it is hard to equate 300 Spartans repelling an invasion of their homeland by a technologically and numerically superior force of Persians with the current Iraq War or any planned invasion of Iran. That is, unless you switch the metaphorical teams. The United States is clearly the superior, invading force in the Middle East. Leonidas personally leads his Spartans against Xerxes' forces and is able to succeed because of superior tactics and knowledge of the terrain. This has been the exact opposite of the current administration's handling of war. Insurgents have used their knowledge of the neighborhoods of Baghdad to their advantage, and are using asymmetrical warfare tactics with unfortunate success. Where was the scene of Leonidas getting into the Laconian Air National Guard and avoiding combat? The charges of homophobia are largely based on two things - the "boy lovers" crack about Athens and the notion that Xerxes was portrayed as gay. Many have pointed out that the Spartans most likely had just as much pederasty as the rest of Greece at the time, so the joke didn't even make sense to anyone with a little historical context. True enough. But I would like to point out that sexual relationships between men and young boys are not the same as homosexual relationships between consenting adults. You can condemn child molestation without being homophobic - in fact, many gay organizations make this point themselves. As for how whether or not Xerxes was gay - I can see where that interpretation comes from, but I guess I didn't interpret it that way. Critics cite the makeup and jewelry, but that to me seemed like obvious symbols of decadence and Xerxes' facade of otherworldliness (and therefor godhood). There is one scene where Xerxes puts his hand on Leonidas' shoulder which some have said looks like a come on - to me, the scene looked more like an attempt at paternalism on Xerxes' part. He was, after all, offering Leonidas control of Greece in return for acknowledging Persia's rule, as you would offer your son the keys to the car if he respects your curfew. This is all not to say that 300 was a perfect film. My biggest criticisms were: 1) Although the vast majority of 300 is an almost miraculously successful translation of comic art to live action, the freakish characters like Ephialtes were overdone and looked a little ridiculous. Why would the Immortals look like the orcs from Lord of the Rings? What was with the giant fat guy with axes for hands? 2) All the mentions of fighting for freedom were a bit much. I get the point, that the Greek city-states fought dearly for their freedom from external rule, but most modern viewers will think the Spartans were talking about the modern idea of freedom - that is, personal political and economic freedom. Sparta wasn't exactly a shining example of this kind of freedom, built on the slavery of serfs working the land. There was some democracy, but only for the few. 3) One of aspects of the story of this battle that made it interesting was the fact that Leonidas knew he was doomed. According to Herodotus, an oracle had told the Spartans that they would either lose their kingdom, or lose their king. So beyond the incredible odds, Leonidas would have gone knowing there was no chance of return. In 300 instead they draw a distinction between the mysticism of Persia and the rationality of the Greeks. It's an interesting choice, but I kind of missed the fatalism of Herodotus' telling. 4) I thought the scenes back in Sparta of Gorgo's attempts to get support for sending the whole army were a good addition, but it was more than just 300 Spartans fighting this war. Thespians and Thebans fought and died with the Spartans and Athens was busy preparing to fight Persia at sea. Adding a bit of larger context, even indirectly could have made this a better movie. Any film worth watching will inspire different interpretations and criticisms, but I recommend you watch 300 before taking some viewer's criticisms (including mine) to heart.

I know that you are all bored waiting for the movie 300 to come out whilst surrounded by the sub par offerings of entertainment Hollywood has thrown you like spoiled meat to a bad dog. There is a movie out there to quench your thirst. I guarantee that you will appreciate the homicidal goodness that is the movie Zodiac. Now, I do not pay attention to pop culture like most other people in America. I didn't have any idea what this movie was about or even that one of my top hotties of all times Jake Gyllenhaal was in this movie. I just know that we were bored on a Sunday night in suburbia and decided to go and see a movie. I don't watch TV at all, I get all of my tasty tidbits of entertainment from the internet, so I have not seen any advertisements for this movie. I do go to the movies sometimes, but and I had not seen any previews for this movie, either. Basically my point is that I don't feel that this movie got the advertisement that it deserved. I don't know how much you know about the Zodiac Killer, but this movie will fill you in on all the details. I know you worry about the length. Don't. It says it's three hours long but it really doesn't feel like it at all. At least until I had to pee, then it felt kinda long. But it is three hours long, that's an incredible amount of time for me to hold my bladder, being a woman of small bladder capacity. Jake Gyllenhaal plays Robert Greysmith, a cartoonist working with the San Fransisco Chronicle who decides to write a book on the Zodiac Killer after no suspects are ever apprehended. This is a true story based off of the book by Robert Greysmith by the same name. This movie is intense and the acting is superior. I don't know what else to say here, except that I have heard that David Fincher is perhaps as obsessive as Robert Greysmith and that he is incredibly meticulous when he directs his films. Which is maybe why we get such fantastic films from him such as this movie, Fight Club and The Game. Also, I guess that I am able to forgive James Vanderbilt for Darkness Falls now that he has screen written such a good movie, but he is not completely in the clear as there was already a book written for him to mooch off of. I am just saying some of the shame has cleared his name with this gem, just not all of it. I mean, how seriously can you take a horror movie where the bad guy is the Tooth Fairy? The Tooth Fairy is grounded, yo. Basically, if you go to see this movie, which I highly recommend you do, I just suck at saying why, you will leave the theater feeling like that is one of the best movies you have seen since Children of Men. Unless you didn't see Children of Men, in which case you need to go out and rent/buy it when it's available (yes, I am aware that there is currently no release date set, but I hear from internal sources that it's due to come out March 27) since you happened to miss one of the very best movies of 2006. My grade for Zodiac is 8.9 out of 10 Reasoning: Very good. A little too long. Phenomenal acting. True and scary story.