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News In Brief

This post is called news in brief because I give brief summaries of the days news and I'm also writing while my underwear. New Hampshire Gets a Little More Gay: NH apporved a bill to allow gay civil unions. Obviously the whole gay storyline from the Sopranos inspired them to approve the unions. The government also voted to change the states bird to the Cock. Russians Aren't Going to Take it Anymore: So the US has started another arms race with Russia over plans to install missle defense stations in Europe. Hurray we get to fight a new Cold War! I'm sure our troops would like to take a break from Iraq and spend some time cooling off in Siberia. Way to go W you never fail to disappoint with your stupidity. $P4MM3R Gets Canned: One of the world's top spammers was arrested so people's inboxes should be a little less full too day. Of course now I don't know where I'll get my my free V14GR4 and other P3N1$ enlarging pills. Fly The Infectious Skies: Some dumbass flew all around the world with a rare and dangerous form of tuberculosis after being told not to fly several times. The other passengers on the plane are being alerted and possibly treated. I order to prevent this thing from happening again anyone sneezing or coughing before boarding the plane will be shot. Better safe than sorry. Jon Lovitz is Still Alive!: Apparently and he signed a life time deal with the Laugh Factory to appear there every Wednesday. So now if your wondering what to do on a Wednesday night in L.A. you can always go see Jon Lovitz or go to a back alley and watch a coat hanger aportion, altough the abortion is slightly funnier.   That's it for today L8TR.